Once again I might just fall into deep regrets, into something I could predict very well and avoided long ago, but I didn't, I ignored my instincts and decided to make her happy, or at least with what I have..
She asked for a cool down period whereby we won't talk or even contact, but deep inside me I already new, this is the end, nothing comes good from a cool down period as I constantly tell myself that I'm gonna give up, and i wanted to push myself so badly to do it..
I know, I spend a lot of cash for her, working my ass off to get my business up at the same time, somehow I knew this wasn't going anywhere and I wanted to give up so badly, yet I pushed on and treated her nicely and pamper her, but she isn't my girl, nowhere near as she does not have the slightest feeling for me...
I felt stupid, like what I felt for the past few relationships, it was dumb, I didn't wanna let go, and at the same time, I wanted to find someone who can always be there for me, is that too much to ask for?
I think I might have finally come to a final conclusion, irony wanna get into any relationships anymore, just be on my own, nobody to talk to...this might even be the end of everything..I hope I stay strong and push on...
Signing off depressed..